Divorce is stressful, and because of that stress you can sometimes agree to things during the process that otherwise wouldn’t be acceptable to you. Many people just want the divorce to be finalized, so they say yes to things to get the process moving. They make concessions, and then later they want to change the agreement because they realize that at least some of it was not in their best interest.
Unfortunately, it can be hard to modify something that you actually, willingly agreed to. Because of that, you need to make sure the original agreement is truly acceptable to you before you allow things to move forward.
Things Get More Expensive Over Time
The cost of child support, alimony, and other maintenance payments or expenses you’ve agreed to isn’t going to go away, and when there are financial ties for a long period of time it can wear on your emotionally. Some things, like a minimum level of child support required by Colorado statutes, aren’t going to go away until the child reaches a particular age, but there’s no reason to agree to extra payments for your spouse beyond what is necessary. Don’t say yes just to get the divorce finalized, as you’ll be paying for that “yes” for a long time.
Custody and the Ending of a Relationship Can Be Big Challenges
Just like with financial pressures, custody issues and animosity toward your ex-spouse can show up again and again after a divorce. Make sure you understand the level of contact you’re agreeing to, what your role is, and what type of custody or visitation you’re being asked to sign off on. If you want custody or partial custody of your children, or you don’t feel the agreement that’s presented to you is fair, don’t agree to it. You have the right to ask for changes, and you should exercise that right before things are settled. They’re much harder to change after the fact.
You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
If you aren’t sure where to turn you’re not alone, but the best option is to work with an attorney familiar with divorce law and the issues that surround it. Then you can focus on what you really do want and need from the divorce proceedings, instead of letting emotions cloud your judgment.
Those emotional decisions made in haste can really come back to be a problem for you later, but an attorney can help you avoid those types of issues. Your attorney will understand and explain the kinds of problems divorcing couples face, and can work with you to ensure that you get an agreement that’s fair and equitable.