Moving is an innately stressful experience. Those who relocate over large distances, in particular, may find the process to be very disruptive. There is a strong association between stressful, traumatic experiences and increased divorce risk. Some people move from one state to another with their families, only to find that their marriages fall apart after the relocation occurs. Individuals who move house may actually experience an increased risk of divorce.
Why do relocations sometimes damage marital relationships and lead to divorce?
People move for the wrong reasons
Some relocations are truly necessary. People have job offers in other states or they must move to take care of ailing family members. Other relocations occur because people want a fresh start. Those going through a tumultuous time in their relationship may start fantasizing that things might be easier in a different location. Those who relocate across state lines or to another city to get away from their marital issues may eventually find that those same issues cause marital conflict even after they move.
Moving can highlight household disparities
More families than ever have two wage earners contributing to the household’s income. However, even in two-income households, it is still relatively common for one spouse to do much more of the mental labor for the family and to manage more of the practical needs of the household. Moving creates a large assortment of new tasks to accomplish. When much of that labor and stress falls to one spouse, they may become resentful about how much they do without acknowledgment.
Stress affects decision-making
Researchers consistently find that moving house is among the most stressful experiences people have. The way that stress affects the brain can cause marital complications. People going through intense stress are more likely to be emotionally volatile. They may deprioritize communication with their spouses and may become angry with minimal provocation. The loss of a familiar environment and difficulty maintaining contact with former support networks may only serve to heighten the stress that people experience during a relocation. There is also the financial strain related to moving house to consider.
Those who have relocated within the last few years may have a higher chance than the average married couple of facing divorce in the future. Preparing for divorce after a move can be a challenge that requires support and careful planning. Particularly if people came from another state, they may need help learning about local rules as they prepare for divorce proceedings.